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do not read further if you're a young and/or sensitive scrublord

caffeine-free script

pretzel: ayy lmao did you guys 'ere about the earthquake in japan

raichu: ""

pretzel: it was godzilla

[HAHAHAHAHA LAUGHLAUGHLAUGH]

pretzel: did you also hear about the blizzard in canada

raichu: ""

pretzel: it was dairy queen's new ice cream called cherrylollipop4kidscigarette

[meanh'while]

soapy: you're gonna GIT inspired

[soapy inflates pretzel]

pretzel: no more inflatish jokes

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